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The Compassion Blog

the practice and science of positive mental health 

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The label sounds ominous, but I assure you imposter syndrome has nothing to do with stealing identities. Imposter syndrome is when a person feels like they’re a phony. Often, someone experiencing imposter syndrome is filled with self-doubt. They might compare themselves to others around them and assume that they just don’t measure up. Those dealing with imposter syndrome tend to attribute successes to luck or outside help and see setbacks as evidence of inadequacy (Brava et al., 2020). Many of us can probably remember a time when we were plagued by the symptoms of this syndrome. Maybe it was when we got into our post-secondary program, started a new job, took a leadership position, or tried to fit in with a new group of friends. This feeling is so common that, over a one-year span, there were 133,425 “likes,” re-postings, and comments related to imposter syndrome on social media (Brava et al., 2020). That tells us that a ton of people are openly sharing their feelings and stories related to this phenomenon. If thoughts of phoniness or self-doubt have crept in on you, that number is evidence that you are certainly not alone in your experience.


Imposter syndrome is when a person feels like they’re a phony. Often, someone experiencing imposter syndrome is filled with self-doubt.

Imposter Syndrome in Post-Secondary

I often see signs of imposter syndrome in my work with young adults who are gaining admission into post-secondary programs or working toward a certain academic goal. In fact, most of the research out there on imposter syndrome has involved student populations. Students with imposter syndrome tend to be self-critical (Kolligan & Sternberg, 1991). As an example, someone with imposter syndrome might thing they got into their program because of a fluke, and that they aren’t as smart as everyone else and didn’t actually earn their spot to be there. They doubt their abilities more than others and expect themselves to perform worse on exams and assignments, even though their grades are no different than students without imposter syndrome (Cozzarelli & Major, 1990). That constant self-doubt is linked to feelings of anxiety and depression, so imposter syndrome is a real risk to mental health.


Imposter Syndrome with Social Groups

Brava et al.’s (2020) meta-analysis -that’s when a group of researchers read as many studies as they can find about a given topic, analyze them for us and then tell us what the takeaways are – found that young adults often experience imposter syndrome with their friend groups. They worry about letting others see their imperfections and they feel afraid about how their popularity might be affected. The research found that people experiencing imposter feelings were more likely to have pessimistic or perfectionistic traits, low self-esteem, and more anxiety. As an example, someone with imposter syndrome when it comes to their friend group might feel like they can't turn to their friends for support because their friends don't have any personal struggles (though we know that's very unlikely). Alternatively, someone might feel like they aren’t as interesting as their friends. That person might judge themselves as boring and try to hide their “boringness." Inwardly, they might feel inauthentic, anxious, and fearful that they will be “found out” and liked less because of it.


Imposter Syndrome with Employment


Imposter syndrome can also creep up on us in our work and careers. Research has studied this phenomenon in teachers, nurses, therapists, doctors, accountants, and managers (to name a few). Employees with imposter syndrome tend to downplay their achievements, have trouble accepting recognition for their successes, and doubt their own expertise in the field. This can lead to more stress, burnout, less work satisfaction, and less motivation to lead (Neuriter & Traut-Mattausch, 2016).


Shaking off Imposter Syndrome


Research has found that high self-worth and social support help protect against the imposter symptoms. In other words, understanding your inherent value, working to see yourself as worthy, and recognizing your successes as being earned can help protect you from imposter syndrome. Sharing your doubts and concerns with friends and family is helpful, too. It also helps to know you aren’t alone in your experience. I’ve heard “Imposter Syndrome” so many times by friends and classmates to know how common it can be. Research has highlighted that self-criticism is linked to imposter syndrome, and we know from research studies that self-compassion helps decrease self-criticism. In light of that knowledge, here are 5 self-compassionate things you can do to address imposter feelings.



5 Ways to Deal


1) Untangle feeling from fact: Sometimes we confuse feelings with facts. Just because we feel something is true doesn’t mean it is. If you tend to think about yourself negatively, then it is a real possibility that you’re clouding your judgment. Ask yourself if the way you’re perceiving the situation has anything to do with how you feel about yourself. If it does, remind yourself that feelings are not facts.

2) Make a list: what experiences brought you to where you are? If you have imposter feelings, you might not be paying enough attention to the obstacles you overcame or the successes you’ve had. New university program? You earned your spot by putting in the work for good grades, by being diligent and networking, by getting that volunteer experience, or by being dedicated enough to complete the prerequisites.

3) Refocus on your strengths: we don’t spend nearly enough time focusing on our strengths. In fact, many of us downright brush them off. Don’t do humankind a disservice by only focusing on weaknesses. You have strengths and positive qualities that have gotten you where you are. You can also use this as an opportunity to refocus on how you’d like to grow and expand your knowledge or skill set. If you don’t feel confident about where you’re at, what can do to help build your confidence? Maybe it’s taking a few more classes or doing some related reading.

4) Reach out: When you notice that self-doubt creeping in, it’s a good time to check in with a friend or loved one if you need a bit of reassurance or validation. If that’s not an option, put some feelers out to those around you: check in with coworkers or classmates and see if they’ve been where you are. Chances are someone has.

5) Bring out the friend pep talk: We tend to be much kinder and rational when we are talking to a friend versus talking to ourselves. What would you say to a friend in your exact situation? What truths or encouragement would they need to hear that you might be denying yourself?



References


Bravata, D. M., Watts, S. A., Keefer, A. L., Madhusudhan, D. K., Taylor, K. T., Clark, D. M., Nelson, R. S.,


Cokley, K. O., & Hagg, H. K. (2020). Prevalence, Predictors, and Treatment of Impostor Syndrome: a Systematic Review. Journal of general internal medicine, 35(4), 1252–1275. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11606-019-05364-1


Cozzarelli, C. and Major, B. (1990)/ Exploring the validity of the impostor phenomenon. J Soc Clin Psychol;9(4):401–17.


Hutchins HM, and Rainbolt H. (2017). What triggers imposter phenomenon among academic faculty? A critical incident study exploring antecedents, coping, and development opportunities. Hum Resour Dev Int. 20(3):194–214.


Kolligian J Jr, and Sternberg RJ. (1991). Perceived fraudulence in young adults: is there an "imposter syndrome"? J Pers Assess. Apr;56(2):308-26. doi: 10.1207/s15327752jpa5602_10. PMID: 2056424


Neureiter M, and Traut-Mattausch E. (2016) An inner barrier to career development: Preconditions of the impostor phenomenon and consequences for career development. Front Psychol;7.


market of clay pots

When we look back on the moments that have shaped our lives, many of us will think of the decisions we made about meaningful relationships, the career paths we pursued, and the post-secondary choices that helped define us. Often, decisions like these about jobs, roommates, relationship partners, and schooling are ones we make between the ages of 18 to 25. Remembering these types of moments from early adulthood with ease is actually called “the reminiscence bump” because these years become such a big part of our identity formation.


Those currently experiencing young adulthood can probably knock off a whole list of stressors impacting them. Those of us who have already navigated those years will know that they are ripe with successes and also full of failures, many being experienced for the first time. Maybe we got into that program we had our eye on, aced that job interview, or put ourselves out there in a moment of vulnerability and ended up getting the date. Other times, we got a failing grade back, we stumbled over our words in an interview and didn’t land the job, we were blindsided by a break-up. We struggled to feel good enough and saw setbacks as personal failures. While that sense of failure is a normal part of life, carrying it around with us can hurt our mental health.


In fact, failure to meet self-expectations is a strong risk factor for developing a mental health concern like depression (Kuwabara, Van Voorhees, Gollan, & Alexander, 2007; Zhang, Kong, Goa, & Li, 2013). Young adults set many expectations for themselves when it comes to relationships, independence, academics, and employment; when they don’t meet those expectations, many will struggle with the realization that they have to adjust their plans. Since we know that young adults have the highest incidence and prevalence of depression of any age group in Canada (Findlay, 2017), it’s fair to say that feelings of failure can take a toll on us and our mental health, especially if we have a hard time bouncing back from those feelings.


“We're human. We set ourselves up and let ourselves down. There's beauty in that shared experience if we look for it.”

5 Ways to Bounce Back From Failure:


  • Let it go: Remember that failing is a part of life. It wouldn’t be the human experience if we didn’t, you know, have human experiences.


  • Notice your thoughts: Don’t confuse failure with “being a failure.” We can’t let our mistakes have so much power over us; failure doesn’t define us. If you’d like to define yourself from a handful of select experiences, why not choose positive ones like times you were confident, empathetic, and successful?

  • Own it: Experiencing failure actually connects us all as humans. We relate to others (and actually might end up liking them more) when they are vulnerable and show us that they aren’t trying to keep a perfect façade up. Not only is it ok to admit we made a mistake, it’s actually important for our relationships.

  • Keep it in perspective: what seems massive to you right now will probably just end up being a small blip when you look back on it down the road. Take a deep breath and a mental “step back.” We want to identify what the failure was so we can learn from it, but we don’t want to over-identify with it. Over-identifying means letting that sense of failure consume us and wallowing in our misery.

  • Learn from it: Failing has a positive purpose if we try to learn from it. Reflecting on how you can grow from the experience is an emotionally intelligent way of moving past failure. For example, if you failed a test, it’s safe to assume your method of studying might not be working out for you. You might have learned that you need to spend more time studying for big exams, or that re-reading notes isn’t that helpful to you and you need to try flashcards instead.

The quick rundown on how and why self-compassion benefits us.




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References

Arslan, C. (2016). Interpersonal problem solving, self-compassion and personality traits in university students. Educational Research and Reviews, 11, 474-481. doi: 10.5897/ERR2015.2605 Breines, J. G., & Chen, S. (2012). Self-compassion increases self-improvement motivation. 79 Personality & Social Psychology Bulletin, 38, 1133-1143. doi: 10.1177/0146167212445599 Gilbert, P. (2009). The compassionate mind: A new approach to life’s challenges. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications. Neff, K. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2, 85-101. doi: 10.1080/15298860309032 Neff, K. D., Rude, S. S., & Kirkpatrick, K. L. (2007). An examination of self-compassion in relation to positive psychological functioning and personality traits. Journal of Research In Personality, 41, 908-916. doi:10.1016/j.jrp.2006.08.002 Neff, K. D., Ya-Ping, H., & Dejitterat, K. (2005). Self-compassion, achievement goals, and coping with academic failure. Self & Identity, 4, 263-287. doi: 10.1080/13576500444000317

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